While there is a general consensus across the nation that what needs to happen is to hoard in any way possible asap and fill the house with everything that you could possibly need for up to 3 years...
...my immediate instinct tends to be the opposite - to throw everything I don't need away, minimize my life in every possible way, get it all OUT! Don't get me wrong, we did some stocking up ourselves, but in terms of furniture, old clothes, boxes in closets, old toys, books, keepsakes - out out out. Perhaps it is the gypsy in me that when crisis comes, it is in my blood to assume that at any point I may need to carry all my belongings (and my babies) on my back.
So this gypsy and her gypsy babies and her most understanding, patient and supportive partner spent the weekend cleaning and ridding our house of as much as we could. I moved both girls into the same room temporarily with the original intention of literally having an empty room to use as a clean pallet for unpacking old boxes, organizing and sorting things and a holding spot for a project that may need a few days to complete.
Because we are going to be in our house many more hours per day than we are used to, I also want a space for us to use as an escape if we need some calm or clarity. My minimalist heart sings in empty rooms. We have a simple phrase in our house - we simply say "I need to take a minute" when we feel overwhelmed, unsure, anxious that our feelings are getting so big they may bubble right over the top and spill all over before we are ready. If any one of us says "I need to take a minute," the rest of us back off and no questions asked, the space is given, the time is allowed, for the thoughts to be processed and the feelings to settle a bit. After such "minutes" there is never an expectation for explanation or sharing, we just move forward in conversation unless voluntarily brought up. It truly is a pause, an opportunity to start fresh.
In a time such as this, I am anticipating an increase in big feelings - particularly the ones that are confusing, overwhelming and hard to process. I am hoping this new empty room will be a nice place for such minutes and feelings. A clear pallet, a blank canvas, a true neutral space.
The girls sharing a room has also instilled a raw comfort that I didn't know I needed in this time of crisis. Having them share a play space and dream space just feels right. Being able to stand in the doorway at night and hear both of them breathing in tandem, regulates my heartbeat to such a trusted rhythm that for those moments, staring into the dark room, it is as if the walls and the words cease to exist and there is only the heavy, deep breaths reverberating and the slow heartbeats in my chest.
Also, if the moment comes to throw our belongings and our babies on our backs, we only need to go into the one room to gather them -- efficiency along with comfort! Can't ask for more than that.
The new shared room...
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